My own draft & my colleagues draft

I've been thinking about my own draft for project three, and I have to tell you that I find it very difficult to describe my place. Because I am talking about a city, and not a specific small house, it is challenging. I have to decide which landmarks in the city are most important so I can describe them for my reader. I can't just choose random places; they need to be places in the city that matter. I want to take my reader visually to the city in which I am speaking about. I want him to feel the greatness of the city, so that he will want to go visit one day.

I am peer reviewing a colleagues draft on project three and my first reaction is that his paper clearly shows the different feelings he has about the golf course. He displays the beautiful feeling of nature as he steps on the golf course, but also the various obstacles and pressures he encounters along the way. I believe he needs to go into more detail about a specific part of golf, or a specific incident that would allow the reader to understand his conflicting feelings.